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    August 21

    RLS TRAINING 006: DAY 1

    got up at 7:30 am
    goin to bed at 10:57
    since thurs night
    I've had no more than 4 hours of sleep each night
    I just moved into my rez, MEK (Mary E. Keyes) last night... late night
    I'm still not unpacking tonight
    I choose sleep
    goodnight
    I lead the -advisor awakening- tomorrow morn... I'm the first!!! oi
    it'll rock the socks of every homie in the hause
    yeye
    I meant it
    July 29

    Tonight was what I expected

    SO!
    today was a day
    I woke up an hour past my alarm
    only to see rain and call my work
    I was un'need'ed
    I stay awake and get some randoms
    cleaned up and sorted in life
    I venture out from burlington 10 min on the highway
    actually
    15 b.c there was swir'vee traf'fic
    did stuff
    including watching the last of the 5
    mac summer drama fest plays
    making light of darkness
    I hang around for a couple conversations
    afterwards
    go to BP and get to see jackie & corey & tashia & ev +
    and it was dandifulll
    I am torn down split
    I decide not to go to hess with them
    NO!
    Emma will spend time with her workies
    back in borington!
    I go to the kingdom
    turns out no one came out from work
    except one gal
    and she brought all her friends
    and I was turned off by the trashy rock
    17 gals with fishnet shit on parts of their body
    they thought they were covering
    I had a little down-time freak out
    where's jess?
    oh she's coming she's coming
    I call
    she's in bed
    ok
    corey? are you at funky yet?
    sooo jac's id didn't work
    so they end up at sidebar
    where I meet them
    I FINALLY get some drink in me
    I just went up to the bar
    funky monkey shot + a hien hein?
    i b4 e eh?!
    I'm forced to down z bubble
    we had to go somewhere else before last call
    yeah
    standing in the middle of hess for 15 min
    IS somewhere else
    I got to elixir to see the line-up
    and hear an
    EMMA!
    as hands came down on my head from the railing
    dearest of kristas
    I goodbye my formers
    and dance at elixir aaaaas everyone is leaving
    turns out! jen's dating alex!!! wwwwwwwwweird
    jen was so gone
    wait
    they allllll were
    so we finally cab it
    I had to be all like
    yo, wanna take the risk of driving 5 people?
    pppplllease mr???
    annnd done!
    so we gino our pizza
    what?
    and it was hot hot hot
    krista couldn't stop yelling at alex
    something along the lines of
    him not having a face if he... lays next to... jen
    yep
    um
    yep
    so mamma is ever so kind and awake
    drives me home
    at the somethingdometre hits 9999
    I video cam'd it on the phone
    we just got the car in april
    yep
    yep
    I crawl up the stairs
    in the elvator
    only to be salted
    yes
    salted
    soooooo my roomates aren't at alll who I requested
    AT ALL
    I get to choose who lives with me
    yet
    no one I chose is...
    ????
    so I type

    I have memories I shouldn't have
    memories that are useless
    arh
    but what defines use anyways?
    July 16

    what Emma don't like yo.

    I really can't stand something
    I was wondering why I always hangup or start to pull away the phone as I am / someone else is sayin goodbyes
    I don't enjoy hearing the click crackle plastic smash sound of someone hanging up
    I shudder!
    and when I hear a door lock behind me
    I don't feel safe! I feel shuddery
    funny huh?
    July 13

    The Rock called Love

    It’s only funny until somebody gets tickled

    So I went to Illinois and saw a shirt.

    That’s about all I did.

    -My name is a scar on His back-

    I’m not sure if I should type –how challenging- or rather –what a challenge-

    Emma is back…ish, n-joy my experiences and thoughts

    I was bein a garbage picker & I found a small goldish lock that was unlocked. I was about to lock it and throw it away when someone asked what it was. I told them that once I lock this lock with no key by its side, it will stay locked longer then any of us will live. I never locked it and it’s in my purse.

    These mass random memories from my LIFE in whole have been jumping at me. I find myself still in motion, piecing together memories that I didn’t even know I had and placing new meaning, hate, and ideas to them. It’s more than that ‘ooooh that’s what that was/ooooh that’s what happened’ feeling, it’s deeper…. At least I would like to think so, as ever.

    Someone, a guy, said he was a gentleman (I guess the modern term would be a ‘good guy’). I disagree. As sweet as he can be with the ladies, I believe the term includes how this –gentleman- treats other men as well.

    Mmmm so convicted. As we all are every day, by our friends, family, those who criticize us most. I’ve been convicted by God. I am blinded by my physical freedom. I need His Love for myself that He helps me daily reveal to others.

    The only thing I want to put into practice is Love. But how else am I living for Him? My identity is in Christ. I’m maturing, but not growing. Are you younger then you were last year? Have I become jaded? You’re not born again to be immature. Why am I not living life abundantly? You are being called to do something EVERY DAY. I’m not listening. Butttt, Light will be Light.

    Give and get nothing. Do it & don’t consider it.

    Something odd in loving remembrance. Not many people have died in my life, but I found myself praying for those who I have known and writing down my memories of / with them. How can I be to help these individuals live on in my life? Six people. Since I was 8 I remember death. The most recent being this past March. Did you know? I do fear physical death. But not for myself. For the others who believe that physical is final.

    When has a sheep ever killed a wolf? When is the right time to hurt your brother? I feel like I just cannot stand people being people anymore. There is enough judgment in our world. MUST you contribute as well?????

    It bugs me to know that I believe so many things that are untrue, yet I don’t know what they are.

    I want more people to say what I need to hear. Not what I want to hear.

    Pleaseplease remember

    That

    Just because someone doesn’t understand you, it doesn’t mean you have to make sense

    Fire be with your love

    Ciao

    M

    June 19

    emma thinks

    it's not that I don't have anything to say lately
    it's just that I don't have anything to think lately
    I just don't think the way I used to or about the -things- in -life- that I used to
    sooooo much doesn't bother me, it's fun
    try it
    it's not that I don't care
    it's that I think it through, seeking the rationale
    then
    I understand
    or at least think I do
    serenity
    I feel safe, soooo spunked (maybe I'm just using that word cause some guys at my work call me spunk... cause appparently I gotsss some), sooo me at neutral
    I am moved, but not bothered
    I am biten, but not hurt

    letting people around me do what they may
    I just give everyone I know or meet as much love as I can
    with that love comes attention, rememberance, and then I sleep


    June 14

    buttt

    I don't want to.

    May 17

    I am SO gooda

    yep. that's about it.
    no more school stresses... I'm taking 2 summer courses now so I dooon't fail out of nursing :P next year and I can do a fab job HPA'ing it up (house program advisor for a residence)
    no more moneys stresses... I'm suprisingling all caught up in my debt, errr but my little "fill out your OSAP" notes I write to myself on every day of my agenda keep getting moved up... every day on my agenda :P I despise forming!! aaah at least gov forms
    no more jobby stresses... I'm in the sketchy midst of quiting my work for the antique dealer and on to my new job starting June 1st!! I just got a call, 2 weeks ago I had an interview, I'm at the front of the house in this brand new classy restaurnt opening up on the bulington lakefront, Spencer's on the Beach! it stands next to nothing but water and sand and pavement, fully glass structure (you know what I mean) with water falls! and a cafe! and everything! eee
    no more wedding stresses... I figured out my wedding plans :) not mine silly, I just lost touch since high school with 2 very important people getting married quite soon, sooo one is this weeeekend, mmm excitement!
    no more facebook stresses... because facebook is not a stress, it is a blessing among blessings in my life and I thank the Lord every night before I go to bed for this wonderful gift in life!
    annnnd CUT
    April 30

    I hereby annnounce

    Monday, May 1st, 2006 will be the best day in awhile
    April 16

    Why DO Women Have Rights?

    Everything expressed here will be out of the ignorance of my experience and the bias of my mind
    But, it is appropriately fitting to the nature and pattern of the -blog- concept
    So Emma is sick of -women- this -woman- that
    We have university courses, graves, and holy days made... holy for women, the great & the un'named
    why must there be -great- women
    as there are -great- men?
    we can only consider the idea of -greatness- as a subjective truth
    My dear mother is great for raising me with crepes in my mouth, yet she is horrid with the skills of driving
    to deem someone, so ever flawful, as a -great- is merely within the tradition of flattery
    I do not care to learn how hard psychological battles were fought so I can be who I am today, only because I still would not care
    Let I wear a skirt or cut my hair, I would only ever let my choice be mine
    I despise female professors, unfortunately nursing comes with more than a handful of those
    I now refuse to take any electives with a woman's voice leading
    Give me a man.
    A man's voice does not have to try to be interesting by making everything a question or pausing for reaction.
    His voice can dominate with a tender whisper.
    Bitterness quite so, I am done now.
    April 14

    IRC Transition Report Excerpt

    I have been thinking of starting this for years now, but I guess now is the appropriate time.  I am so sorry that I will forget everything or nothing or simply something in between.  Trying to keep this written tradition rolling, please know that verbally I can hand over the world of McKay, but in this written form there is only so much memory my computer can hold and only so many vulgarities I can express without being completely erased from IRC history.

    April 01

    joy

    a reflection of the year...
     
    • bubble blading
    • birthday week
    • bring your weapons
    • hairy floors
    • gettin thrown in the shower
    • mudsliding
    • clogging the tub
    • pouring salt in the tub to unclog it (bah. engineers)
    • first year drool
    • who's the shit?
    • the pavement
    • traybogganing
    • nurses on top
    • funky fridays
    • quarters thurs... iick.
    • yellow hat & massive avs
    • theatre'g
    • evidence
    • all nighters
    • chai latee
    • swinging
    • breaking the swing
    •  
    • the unwanted clap
    •  
    • is that your thong?
    •  
    • KY [the person]
    •  
    • falling on a knife
    •  
    • jumping badly
    •  
    • actually using my wheelchair
    •  
    • the keyboards are there for aesthetic purposes
    •  
    • creepy guy with no shirt on
    •  
    • live nudes
    •  
    • Perdo
    •  
    • moms forever
    •  
    • being
    March 27

    floi

    second year is almost money
    oi to finding a job
    now I'll have to smile n walk a lot that's what job finding means to me
    and everyone knows how much emma hates smiling
    arh. pleasing people. how gross
    annnnyways
    I'm so tiredtoredtured
    and I just want to be me n have time n not be scheduled
    except for my job
    I want a normal normal job this sumemr cause I've always been miss random waitress gal
    I need norm mechanical jazz happening
     
    spring is here. you know what that means!
    spring is here.
     
    so close to c-stone, I cannot wait until thaaaat redemption
    c-stone defines summer to me now
    the centre of freedom
    maybe this year I will run away and live in bushnell forrrrrever
    that's would be hot
     
    I miss real trees
    none of this cootes shit
     
    I miss smelling air
    and taking pictures of anything but people
    I miss not being tired all the time
     
    I'm back to lieing to myself now
    -oh the summer will be great! I'll get so much reading done!!!-
    bah. right. I've fooled myself so many summers
    what will make this one different?
    perhaps will?
    Emma don't know!
     
    well it's late n I have to be up in about 4 hours
    that will be nice
    I miss cooking formyself
    Keyes shall be gooda for that
    oka
    welllllla
    emma sleeps
    and you stop reading
    actually don't
    March 25

    emma

    tired
    March 22

    nurse amanda

    amanda my dear
    happy (now belated) birthday
    may your hair hold strong
    n hey! the next morn after I gave you the plant
    I saw the EXACT same one in the CLC n I was like
    pah
    but I know
    Emma knows
    coiiincidences
    I finished my philo paper!! eeee only took my life n eyes for a few years
    now PBL LP eh
    ah yes, you
    bask in the photography birthday lady
    Friday's alcohol luck will be fabulous
    I'm allll out for it
    I am in need for Friday
    it's my half way point in... insanity for all these papers
    love love
    come seee me
    I'm in mckay's lobby alllll day (mostly'ish) for the referendum
    kiss! n tell emma what your boy did for your late night bday suprise!
    March 21

    tonight

    I had waaay more fun then I really should be having
    March 17

    Perception of Canadians

    Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter Olympics, these are some questions people the world over are asking!!!!

    Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website. Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked!!!!!.


     
     Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? (
    England)

    A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watchthem die.


    Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)

    A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.


    Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow the Railroad tracks? (Sweden)

    A: Sure, it's only four thousand miles, take lots of water.

        

    Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)

    A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

       

    Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)

    A: Let's not touch this one.


    Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (England)

    A: What did your last slave die of?

        

    Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada?  (USA )

    A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of
    Europe
    .  Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it.  Sure,
    the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in
    Calgary
    . Come naked.


    Q: Which direction is North in
    Canada? (USA
    )

    A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.


    Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (England)

     A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.


    Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)

    A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, whichis...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in
    Vancouver and in Calgary
    , straight after the hippo races.  Come naked.

        

    Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)

    A: No, WE don't stink.


    Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you sell it in Canada? (USA)

    A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.


    Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)

    A: Yes, gay nightclubs.


    Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)

    A: Only at Thanksgiving.


    Q: Are there supermarkets in
    Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany
    )

    A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.


    Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)

    A : It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

     

    Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)

    A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.
    March 07

    if you knew

    if you knew that the person you were talking to on the phone would die
    and that would be the last time you would ever talk to them
    would you ever hang up?
    March 06

    A Play I am In - It's Free!

     

    Event Name:

    The Pursuit of Perfection

     

    "Director's Series Play"

    Hosted By:

    McMaster School of Arts

    Event Type:

    Performance

    Location:

    Chester New Hall

    Robinson Memorial Theatre

    Phone:

    905.220.0580

    Email:

    davise@mcmaster.ca

    D e s c r i p t i o n

        14 Characters           6 Actors

    4 Theatrical explorations of eating

    disorders and their effects on the

    lives of those who suffer from them

     

    -  Thursday March 9

    at 12:30 pm  -

    -   Friday March 10

    at 7:00 pm   -

    -  Saturday March 11

    at 9:00 pm  -

     

    I certainly hope to see you there

    March 03

    how bore

    you can only expect so much from a cookie cutter
    March 02

    life

    what a bloody bite